Candace and the Kids
by Resisting the Borg
Summary: Candace is accidentally given superpowers, and things start happening. This is my first fanfic, so I'd like a little constructive critisism, okay?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, I'm coming back to make this chapter a little bit more comprehensible.**

Phineas, Ferb, and company sat around the breakfast table, discussing the day's activities animatedly—in specific, what _were_ they going to do today?

"Math!" proclaimed Baljeet. Phineas shook his head.

"Become superheroes," Irving put in.

"Been there, done that."

"Nerds are in season," Buford announced, "why not let's—"

"No," Phineas cut him off.

"Giant robot unicorn?" Isabella suggested. The mostly male population around the breakfast table simply looked at her. "Okay, maybe not."

Phineas looked around. "Come on, guys!" he exclaimed, "You should have plenty of ideas! This is our inspirational place!"

"Why not build the most awesome thing ever?" Irving asked.

"That's lined up for next Tuesday. Come on, Ferb, what do you think?"

The usually silent step-brother looked up. "Well, I was originally going to devote most of my time to completing my _Pokémon White_ video game, but I think that maybe we could delve into the repair capabilities of applied nanotechnology."

"Huuuh?" asked Buford.

"He means fix things with tiny robots," hissed Baljeet.

"Oh, oh, I knew that!"

"Ferb, that's brilliant!" Phineas shouted joyously, "Why didn't you say so before?" Ferb gave him a calm, complacent look. "Yeah, other than that."

"Are you going to say it?" asked Isabella.

"Why should I?" replied Phineas.

"Well, you look so _cute_ when you say it!"

"Huh?"

"Nothing."

Phineas blinked, then continued: "Besides, I think that _Ferb_ knows what we're gonna do today. Let's go!"

* * *

Meanwhile, in Candace's room, the above teenaged girl was unloading on Stacy, as was her custom.

"I don't want to have to watch my brothers, Stace! I have places to go and things to do! And I don't want to blow a hot date to—"

"Before you go to places best left unseen," Stacy cut her off, "I think that I need to remind you that you _are_ sixteen. Responsibility comes with age."

"I don't _want_ this 'responsibility'," Candace replied, "I want to have fun!"

There was a noise that, if you heard it, would have made you think it was either a banshee, a pair of tomcats having it out in the front yard, or, possibly, one of Baljeet's rock ballads, whichever one sounds worst.

"I've got to go, Stace," Candace announced. She ran out of the room. Stacy looked around.

"Hey," she exclaimed at length, "Where's Perry?"

* * *

"Morning, Agent P," proclaimed Major Monogram, "We've just gotten this one in from our sources. Doofenshmirtz is—Um, Carl, there's no one there."

"This is a rehearsal, sir," Carl replied from off-screen, "We want this to sound _good._"

"I don't see why we'd need to rehearse a briefing," Major Monogram exclaimed.

Perry came in and sat down.

"Well, what would your wife say?" Carl asked.

"She wouldn't care one way or the other," Monogram contested.

"Ladies like things to sound _good_," Carl shot back.

"So you're trying to impress a girl you like?" Monogram questioned, "Who is it? That Jane girl?"

"HER NAME'S JANIS!" Carl shouted, then, in a more conservative tone, added, "and no, I'm not in love with her."

"Are you sure? Cause you're showing the signs of it!"

"No! She's way older than me!"

"Is she some kind of supermodel?" Monogram asked gleefully, "Well?"

"She's my dad's wife," Carl snapped.

In the uncomfortable silence that followed, Monogram noticed Perry sitting at the console.

"AGENT P!" he exclaimed, "You didn't, uh, hear that, did you?"

Perry gave him a level stare.

"Well, um, Anyway!" Monogram continued, "We've just gotten this in from one of our sources. Doofenshmirtz has been doing some suspicious things. He's purchased all of the water balloons in the Tri-State Area." He paused. "Well, actually, we didn't get any names, but we're pretty sure it's him. Get out there, and put a stop to it!"

Perry ran out of the room. Monogram looked after him, and then turned to Carl.

"This never leaves this room."

"Fine by me."

* * *

"One thing's for certain," Phineas announced, "We've got to do something about that noise. It sounded like a banshee, a pair of tomcats having it out in the front yard, or, possibly, one of Baljeet's rock ballads."

"Whichever one sounds worst," added Ferb.

"I find your lack of respect disturbing," Baljeet noted.

"But, other than that, it works. We've repaired the phone book, the gate, the table, and the television in that order, and then necessarily defused the nanomites in each case. I'd say the Nano-fuser works just fine! We just have one more test we need to perform. Ferb?"

Ferb raised a pencil in the air, and snapped it. Dropping it on the ground, he prepared a rifle-like object on a tripod. He aimed it at the broken pencil, and stepped away. Phineas began a countdown.

"Fusing in Ten… Nine… Eight… Seven… Six… Five… Four… Three… Two… One..."

Candace stepped in front of what was apparently the Nano-fuser. "You—"

There was a brilliant flash of light, and the sound of a banshee, a pair of tomcats having it out in the front yard, or, possibly, one of Baljeet's rock ballads.

"—guys are so busted!" She paused. "I feel… different. Stronger." She turned, and fell flat on her face.

"Definitely one of Baljeet's rock ballads," Isabella declaimed.

"You're talking about me like I'm not here!" Baljeet shouted.

"It's the truth," Buford pointed out.

"YOU TOO? IS THERE NO ONE I CAN TRUST?" Baljeet screamed.

"Samurott is strong against fire-types, you fool!" Ferb proclaimed, attracting some weird glances. Phineas rolled his eyes.

"You okay, Sis?" he asked Candace.

"No thanks to you! I'm calling Mo—" She checked her pockets for her cell phone, and came up with nothing. "Oh, my cell phone's in my room." She walked to the door, and accidentally ripped it off it's hinges.

"Wow! You gave your sister _super-powers?_ That is so cool!" Irving said.

Phineas shook his head, "There's no way of knowing if the nanomites will affect her in an adverse manner. We need to defuse them. Candace, if you'll just stand still…"

"Are you _kidding me_?" Candace shouted in an exhilarated tone of voice, "Super-powers? That's awesome! I can do whatever I want! I'm free!" She vanished in a blur and a rush of wind, leaving her cries of "Free… free… free…" hanging in thin air. The younger kids stood around with jaws dropped. Stacy walked into the yard and examined the door.

"So, can anyone tell me what just happened?" she asked.

"If I'm right," Phineas replied tentatively, "We just messed up big time."


	2. Chapter 2

**_Thanks for all the advice! In this chapter, I'll be introducing an original character. Tell me what you think._**

_Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!_

Perry swung in the Not-So-Good Doctors window. He found himself in a dimly lit room with a bed, a dresser, and a mirror. Perry looked around in confusion, and then pulled out a floor plan of the building.

_Lab… Bathroom… Vanessa's Bedroom…_

He pocketed the map, and raced from the room.

"Perry the Platypus?" exclaimed Dr. Doofenshmirtz, "What were you doing in my daughter's room? Did you swing in the wrong window or something?" Perry nodded. "Well, as I always say, your presence here is so totally incomprehensible. And by incomprehensible, I mean… Ok, you know what, we always do this. I'll just trap you now, if that's all right."

Doofenshmirtz smashed a button on the wall. A huge slice of stale cheese came smashing down on Perry, and flattened him out against the floor.

"Now," Doofenshmirtz continued, "You may be wondering, what is he doing? What does he want? Why has he got all these water balloons sitting around the apartment?"

Perry looked around, and realized that yes, the apartment was "flooded," as they say, with water balloons.

"Well, you see, I recently built a Water-Balloon-Inator. Yeah, you see, that huge spidery-looking Inator over in the corner. With it, and these balloons, I have a non-ending supply of loaded water balloons, which I will use to soak THE ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA! As to why I'm doing this, I'm afraid I forgot."

Perry gave him a level glare.

"Oh, the cheese? Well, it's embarrassing, but I think that I'm running out of ideas for traps. But whatever. It's _really _stale cheese, so I don't see anyone eating it any time soon, due to basic human aversion to stale cheese."

* * *

Phineas and company were headed in the direction that they were pretty sure that Candace had taken.

"Hi there. Are you looking for something?" They looked up to see a blond girl sitting on the fence.

"Yeah," Phineas replied, "We're looking for mine and Ferb's sister, who may have run past here in a multicolored blur, yelling 'Free… free… free...' You seen her?"

"Yep," the girl replied, "she passed by not to long ago. I'm Becky. Who're you?"

"I'm Phineas, and these are Ferb, Isabella, Irving, Buford, and Baljeet. You want to come?"

"Sure," Becky replied. She jumped down and joined them.

"So does your sister always do that?"

"Well, usually she's a little slower about it, but yeah."

"Cool."

* * *

Meanwhile, Stacy had quickly found Candace at the mall, carrying a massive heap of recently purchased items.

"How are you even able to lift all those?" she asked.

"Not even breaking a sweat," Candace boasted.

"That doesn't answer my question," Stacy pointed out.

"Phineas and Ferb zapped me with some sort of nanobot thingie," Candace replied, "So I have superpowers! Isn't it awesome?"

Stacy paused, and then ventured, "You know what that Peter kid always says about great power, how it always comes with…"

"Stacy, I couldn't care less about responsibility! I just want to spend some time with Jeremy! And do some shopping! And bust my brothers! And I can prove it this way!"

"Candace," Stacy attempted, but she was cut off.

"And check it out! I can surf the web in my head! Ooh, I wonder if I can download apps!"

"Candace, you can't be too careful with this stuff…" Stacy repeated.

"I think I'm finally gonna be able to win Angry Birds," Candace announced confidently.

* * *

Vanessa had just arrived at her father's building. She stared up at it, just knowing that she was going to be spending a long, hard, crazy, scheme-and-platypus-filled weekend. Needless to say, she wasn't very excited about it.

But she doesn't come into the story yet, so just forget about her.

* * *

While _that_ was going on, the kids were searching around for Candace, entirely unsure of where Candace was. Isabella, meanwhile, was inquiring into Becky's family history.

"So," she began, "would we have heard about any of your family?" Becky held her chin and thought.

"Nah," she said at length, "I don't think so."

"What are your favorite past times?"

"Well, I'm pretty good with computers and that kind of thing, Mom and Dad like to collect Sci-Fi paraphernalia, and my brother Cade's got this crime fighting thing going on."

Isabella's eyes widened. "Crime fighting? Really? I've never heard of him!"

"He _does_ like to stay under the radar," Becky conceded.

"Has he ever worked with, you know, _her?_" Irving asked hopefully.

"Kind of depends on who you mean by her," Becky replied.

"The girl with the naked mole rat?"

Becky gave him a puzzled glance, and rolled her eyes. "Oh, _that_ her. Yeah, he has once or twice, but he doesn't really talk much about that stuff."

"You think that I could meet her…?" Irving asked hopefully. Buford and Baljeet groaned in unison.

"Probably not."

"An-y-way," Phineas broke in, "We're kind of on a schedule here, people. We've got to keep moving."

Another fifteen minutes or so passed, with nothing happening but Ferb and Becky discovering that they had something in common.

"… But I still think that a Serperior could defeat an Emboar if it wanted to," Becky explained.

"But I have a Blaziken against Isabella's Sceptile, and I've beaten her every time," Ferb replied.

"I think that lies in the fact that you're some kind of pro gamer," Becky countered. Ferb shrugged.

"Oh, come on," Phineas exclaimed, "I thought you came along to help us find our sister, not talk shop!"

Becky rolled her eyes. "Seriously, did you not try the mall yet?" Everyone froze.

"You know, I can't believe we didn't think about that before," Phineas realized.

"To the mall!"

* * *

Meanwhile, Perry was gnawing his way free of the stale cheese. It tasted horrible, but seriously; who wants to be trapped under a piece of cheese, no matter _how_ fresh it is? And besides, Platypuses... Platypi... Platy... Well, you know. They're less vulnerable to stale cheese than humans are.

"So move the Water-Balloon-Inator over to the window," Doofenshmirtz repeated to himself, trying desperately to move the massive machine over. "Hey, Perry the Platypus? If I free you, could you help me move this over to the window? Cause I promise I won't trap you after that if you don't attack prematurely." Perry thought this over a moment, and nodded.

"All right!" Doofenshmirtz hit the wall button again, and Perry was freed. He walked over, and put his shoulder to the machine. Just then, Vanessa walked in. She gave the scene a practiced appraising, and rolled her eyes.

"Do I even need to ask?" she grumbled.

"Oh, Vanessa! Perry's helping me get set up before he attacks me. Want to help too?" Vanessa walked over to the TV and grabbed the remote. "Okay, maybe not."

Suddenly, there was a noise like a banshee, a pair of tomcats having it out in the front yard, or, possibly, one of Baljeet's rock ballads.

"Who's Baljeet?" asked Doofenshmirtz. But it didn't matter just then, because the Water-Balloon-Inator stood on spidery legs, and knocked them back.

"It can walk!"

"I. AM. THE. _AVATAR!_" It roared in a not-so-spidery voice.

"I thought avatars were giant blue aliens?" Doofenshmirtz asked.

"Umm, no," the Water-Balloon-Inator replied thoughtfully.

"What about little bald kids with wei-rd psychic powers?"

"I'M NOT MAKING A POP CULTURE REFERENCE, FOOL!" the W-B-I, as we might as well call it from now on, roared again, "BUT I WILL CONQUER THE WORLD!"

"You know, Perry the Platypus," Doofenshmirtz sighed, "I think it's just gonna be one of those days."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the advice (and the links). I guess I should explain right now, Becky has a certain purpose. She's here to be a total genius and a hacker (which is a title that some non-criminals really like, apparently). I do not see her as needing character development in future fanfics, although I might end up changing my mind. Becky is just a really really smart ten-year old.**

**Anyway, this latest chapter ended up coming out (I thought) with a slightly more snarky tone (such the warning sign when Buford casually breaks… something not meant to be broken). Also, there are one or two more pop culture references, and an in-joke that I hope someone outside of my immediate family picks up on.**

As Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Irving, Buford, Baljeet, and Becky entered the store, they were struck by how many of them had names that started with the letter "B." Then, they were struck by the fact that the mall looked as if it had been ripped apart by a number of insane electrical appliances (this, by the way) is distinctive because insane electrical appliances are not naturally gifted with claws or teeth, and must resort to spectacular methods to actually rip an object).

On the third floor, they found Stacy kneeling over the prone Candace. Phineas raced over.

"What happened?" he asked worriedly. Stacy looked up at him.

"She tried to download _Angry Birds_ into her mind, and just kind off collapsed. Then all these machines went nuts."

"So why did that happen?" Phineas asked.

"I don't know, but she did this because you shot her full of something. What was it?"

"Actually, she stepped in the way of the Nano-fuser, and ran off with some kind of warp speed ability. We were only just able to find her," Isabella offered by way of explanation. Becky nodded.

"_Now_ it all makes sense," she exclaimed. "When she attempted to download the app, Candace was using a piece of equipment that wasn't designed to do anything like that. Not only did it knock her out, but it generated an energy wave that created a system of evil electronics. It's like an evil mini-internet."

Everyone paused and stared at her.

"Sure, why not?" announced Phineas at long length.

"So how do we fix this?" asked Baljeet.

"The energy wave probably had a similar signature to the Nano-fuser. If you can replicate the defusing function, you'll be able to create a weapon that can bring them down, but you'll need to deactivate the focal point—that would be the digital machine that got hit the hardest—of the blast if you want to bring the whole system down. Meanwhile, give me a non-evil cell phone, and I can probably reboot Candace.

"It's kind of scary how you're only _ten years old,_ and you know all this stuff," Stacy pointed out.

Becky smirked and nodded. "Isn't it?"

"And," Buford added, "it—_PRIORITY: HERE, BUFORD POINTS SOMETHING THAT, ALTHOUGH NOT VERY IMPORTANT TO THE PLOT, KIND OF BREAKS SOMETHING NOT MEANT TO BE BROKEN. TO PREVENT THE IMMEDIATE DISCOVERY OF WHAT, THIS HAS BEEN ENCODED WITH A SIMPLE CIPHER_—gives her a worthy reason for being in this fanfic in the first place."

"Isabella, you wait here with Becky," Phineas decided. "I'm gonna go home and get the cell phone and the plans for the Nano-fuser. Buford and Baljeet, collect materials. And Ferb… Say, where is he? Well, Irving, you just go do something useful with yourself."

* * *

Ferb was running toward Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated as fast as he could move, with a 0.5 second stop to grab a hammock. He had figured out where she lived a long time ago—no, it's not like that. He just ended up knowing where she lived one day through random chance, but we aren't really sure how it happened.

What? Oh, come on! You seriously still think that?

Fine. Whatever. You're just wrong about it.

Anyway, the mall was fortunately not far away from DEI (how does he know this? The rollercoaster _did_ need _some_ planning, no?). Ferb sprinted around the corner as he tried to figure out a possible course of action. No matter what, he couldn't let Vanessa get hurt. The only foreseeable problem was that he had only grabbed a hammock, having had no time to go to the grocery store to pick up a jug of orange juice.

* * *

Meanwhile, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, Perry, and the above-mentioned Vanessa were being menaced by the W-B-I, as we're calling it now, or the Avatar, which was what it was calling itself, which had somehow (hint hint) gained sentience, and decided it wanted to take over the world.

"Hey," exclaimed Doofenshmirtz, "wait a second! I have dibs on the Tri-State Area!" He paused. "Tell you what, I'll conquer the Tri-State Area, and you can borrow it from time to time."

"So, a rival?" The machine hissed.

"Dad," Vanessa hissed, "you really don't have very good judgment, do you?"

"Well if I did, do you think I'd be fighting Perry the Platypus all the time?—no offense, Perry the Platypus."

Perry shrugged.

"If that is so," continued the W-B-I/Avatar, "I cannot let you or your companions live any longer!" It swiped at them. Perry and Doofenshmirtz, who had histories of similar things happening to them, leapt aside, but Vanessa was hit dead on, and fell out of the window.

"VANESSA!" screamed Doofenshmirtz. He whipped around and headed for the stairs. Perry rolled his eyes, and dashed after him. The W-B-I/Avatar charged after them on it's spidery legs, squeezing through the gaps between flights.

"I AM THE AVATAR!" it shouted

Okay, okay. Sheesh.

* * *

Outside, Ferb arrived in time to see Vanessa dropping with—well, obviously—great rapidity. He quickly wrapped one end of the hammock around a conveniently nearby lamppost, and, holding on to the other end, stretched it as far as it would go. Vanessa landed, bounced twice, and rolled off with a confused expression on her face. She looked up.

"Oh, Ferb. Figures. Every time I fall, you seem to catch me one way or another. How does that keep happening, anyway?"

Ferb stood frozen in place, the sound of her voice music to his-

"Ferb? Well?" He shook himself out of his trance.

"Would you believe… sheer coincidence?" Ferb asked.

"Umm, I'd really have to say no."

"Well it's gonna have to do, because I can't think of else anything to say."

Suddenly, Doofenshmirtz and Perry came charging out. Doofenshmirtz panted to a standstill, while Perry, who had taken a way requiring less physical exertion—i.e., throwing himself down the middle of the stairwell—slowed to a halt. He looked up to make sure that Vanessa was all right, and then he turned toward… Ferb?

_Secret Platypus Thought Translator in use_

_Not good._

After which, the "Avatar" smashed though the wall, and landed in front of them. Perry grabbed Doofenshmirtz, and everyone ran for their lives, the mechanical beast right on their tail.

"I AM THE AVATAR!" It roared, proclaiming what had already been established.

* * *

Meanwhile, Candace had finally come to. She sat up, a little dazed, as Phineas and Stacy attempted to explain what happened.

"So," she finally said, "I did this by trying to download an app?"

"Yep," Isabella replied.

"And there's evil machines running around?"

"Yep," Becky announced.

"And how do we get out of the blast zone?"

"What makes you think you're leaving?" Isabella asked incredulously.

"Well, this thing wants to destroy life as we know it, correct?"

"Yes."

"Therefore," Candace reasoned, "We would want to stay away from it, correct?"

"No, we want to stop it," Isabella corrected.

"Well, I want to get away from it!" Candace shot back.

"You do that, and I'll lock you in a dark room…" shouted Isabella.

Candace rolled her eyes. "I stopped being scared of the dark two weeks ag—"

"_With Suzy Johnson._"

Candace stared in horror. "You wouldn't."

Isabella grinned darkly. "Try me."

Candace groaned. "Okay, okay, I'll do it. But I blame you for making me fear the dark again."

"That's nice," replied Isabella sweetly.

"So how do we fight it?" Candace asked despondently.

"We actually haven't thought about it yet," Phineas replied. Buford and Baljeet had given him a massive amount of parts, and he was assembling Nano-defuser guns and an astounding rate. "All we know is, the focal point of the blast, which we need to take out anyway, is headed down Jacobs, turning on Marsh…"

"It's coming towards us!" Candace exclaimed.

"How would you know that?" Stacy asked.

"I'm a _teenaged girl_, Stace. You honestly don't think that I'm gonna know every possible way to get to the mall?"

"Um, guys?" Buford asked.

"Yes Buford?"

"Look!"

A group of televisions, computers, and gaming consoles were coming down on them quickly. Baljeet screamed, and jumped into Buford's arms in a Scooby-Doo-esque moment of sheer yet ridiculous terror. Phineas seized a completed defuser, and fired a wide sweep. Every single appliance smashed to the ground.

"I hope we don't have to pay for that," Stacy worried.

"I'm almost disappointed!" boasted Phineas.

"Don't say that!" Candace shouted slamming her fist on an as-of-yet unmentioned bowling ball that pretty much disintegrated.

"Phineas, I hate to correct you, you know, but she's kind of right," Isabella pointed out. "Whenever someone says something like that, a kind of big monster smashes through the wall."

Doofenshmirtz, Perry, Vanessa, and Ferb ran through the door, which, along with a substantial portion of the wall, was smashed in by the "Avatar."

"I guess I see what you mean," noted Phineas. "Candace, those superpowers you've got now?"

"Yes?" Candace asked, standing up.

"Now would be a great time to start actually using them."

"Is that _Ferb_ down there?" Irving asked.

Candace took a step forward.

"_CANDACE!_" Stacy screamed, becoming hysterical, "_DO SOMETHING!_"

"I'm _getting_ my _bearings_," Candace hissed, "It's taking a little while to recover from this." She began jogging toward the "Avatar," picking up speed until her legs became a blur. She leapt down toward the machine, and completely ruined the dramatic effect by splaying her arms and legs out and screaming at the top of her nanomite enhanced lungs, which was really something.

**This next chapter will actually be the last one, but this fic is the first in a planned trilogy involving two others who end up in somewhat similar straits to Candace. Please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Well, this is it; the last chapter. Hope anyone reading has had fun. Reviews, and any ideas you may have for the sequal that I could add on (this one features... STACY!) And now...**

Everyone in the lobby froze and looked up.

Less than a second before impact, Candace collected herself, realized what she was doing, clasped her hands together, and began to swing them downward.

She landed a direct hit on the "Avatar," smashing it into the ground, and flipped to her feet. Everyone stared.

"What're you waiting for?" Candace shouted. "Run!"  
That got them going. They dashed up the stairs as Candace tried to run after them, but was grabbed by the "Avatar."

Seriously, why the quotation marks? To denote that it's not a universally recognized term for giant spidery W-B-Is. But I digress.

The "Avatar" stood shakily, turning her to face it. "Another rival," the machine rumbled. "YOU shall suffer the fate of the first!"

"Umm, a rival in what?" Candace asked.

"Conquering the world!" the "Avatar" slammed her down. Candace broke free, and dodged away. It stabbed at her, and she knocked it's leg aside. Another stab, and she caught this one. The two pause, as if considering this new turn of events.

* * *

Meanwhile, Phineas was finishing one more Defuser, as Ferb, Vanessa, Doofenshmirtz, and Perry ran in.

"Ferb!" Stacy shouted, "Where were you? We could've used your help a few minutes ago!"

"I had other work to do," Ferb replied coolly.

"He saved my life for the sixth time in immediate memory," Vanessa explained. Doofenshmirtz stared at him.

"The sixth? What, are you a professional hero or something?"

"No, the whole 'superhero' thing was a one-time thing," Phineas replied, "Although I have noticed that we seem to meet up with Vanessa a lot."

"You _do_, _do _you?" Doofenshmirtz growled in a voice that was probably meant to be menacing, but ended up sounding kind of like a chipmunk. Perry punched him in the nose.

"What was that for?"

Perry chattered.

Isabella stared.

"Is that… No, probably not." She answered her own question.

"But anyhoo, why exactly is my Inator trying to kill me this time?"

"You mean this has happened before?" Becky asked, extremely interested.

"Not quite like this, but yeah, it happens a lot."

"Okay," Phineas announced at last, "That's the last one. We've got to cover the… Inator… from a number of different points. When I give the signal, fire."

* * *

Back in the lobby, Candace had broken the standoff by running under the "Avatar" to the other side, and yanking the leg off of it, if this last sentence made any sense at all. She casually threw it aside.

"That all you got?" she asked casually. The machine responded by blasting her with a series of rapid-fire water balloons. Pretty soon, Candace was shoved toward the door and standing shin deep in water.

"How many balloons have you got?" she sputtered.

"Enough to soak the Tri-State Area!" shouted Doofenshmirtz, popping up from behind a shelf. A hand reached up and yanked him down. The "Avatar" spun around to find him, giving Candace all the opportunity she needed. She grabbed it by the leg, and hurled it into the air. As it came down, she thrust her hands upwards to make a sizeable dent. She flipped it around and held aloft. Then one of the legs reached down and knocked her away. She landed next to Ferb.

"You guys have something to get this thing with?" Candace asked, standing up and beginning to turn away from the "Avatar." Ferb gave her a thumbs up, and, as she was off balance, shoved her back out.

* * *

We now take an intermission.

* * *

"Becky, Platypus in a hat, Vanessa, take the left," Phineas ordered. The three broke off, and headed for cover behind a shelf.

"That guy is good," Phineas noted.

"We should look him up some time," Ferb agreed.

"Vanessa's dad, Buford, Irving, take the right. Baljeet, Ferb, you've got the front. Isabella, Stacy and I have the front. Let's go."

Ducking from shelf to shelf, each group ran for their assigned position. Meanwhile, Candace was dodging water-balloon blasts while trying to get away.

"Candace!" Baljeet shouted, "progressively smaller concentric circles!"

"Huh?" Candace shouted back.

Doofenshmirtz tripped over his shoulder (very few people can do this, but he's one of them). Buford and Irving lost valuable time dragging him to safety.

"Never mind that, just jump on it!"

"I don't want to do that!" shrieked Candace.

"It won't be able to hit you that way!"

"So?"

Down the room, Vanessa groaned. "Put it this way," she called, "do you WANT to get hit?"

"Duh! No!"

"Well then!"

"Oh."

Candace leapt above the blasts to land on the "Avatar's" back.

"How is it that the Water Balloon shooting thingy is actually dangerous?" Stacy asked.

"Does it matter?" Isabella replied, "I have an Evil-Inator-Busting Patch to earn!"

"Whatever you're gonna do," Candace shouted, "You'd better do it!"

"All right, FIRE!"

The Defusers hit the "Avatar" at multiple points. There was a sound like a banshee, a pair of tomcats having it out in the front yard, or—

"DON'T SAY IT!" screamed Baljeet.

The "Avatar" collapsed, and Candace slid off of it.

"You're alive!" Stacy shouted.

"You'd think that'd be kind of obvious," Candace replied. She looked down at her hands. "I feel… different." She looked down at Phineas.

"Well," he considered, "It was kind of likely that you would get hit by the Defusers too. So yeah, I think you might have lost your powers.

"Well, at least I can bust you with all this evidence around me!" Candace realized. Then she looked around to discover that the mall was somehow magically returned to it's former consumerized glory.

"Hey, what the…?"

"Duct tape," replied Ferb, holding up a roll of the stuff, "First law of the universe."

"Figures," groaned Candace, "How am I ever going to bust you guys?"

"Well, personally…" Phineas began, and then pulled Candace down and whispered in her ear.

"Really?"

"Really."

Candace started for the door, and then fell face down.

"Actually," Phineas remanded, "you aren't in any condition to run off and try to bust someone. We'd better get you home." He and Ferb took her arms, and started pulling her away. Doofenshmirtz turned to Perry.

"Well," he proclaimed, "It's not exactly what I planned, but I still have enough water balloons to soak the ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA!" A water balloon hit him in the face.

"Oh so _that_'s how it is, Perry the Platypus?" Doofenshmirtz seized one of his own.

Vanessa walked for the door. "I think I'll head back to the apartment and get some towels ready." Doofenshmirtz and Perry weren't listening, as they were hurling water balloons at each other.

* * *

Meanwhile, the others were headed home from a successful battle that had, as projected, saved the world from domination by an evil mini-internet.

"So, I've been working on a nanobot project of my own recently," Becky pronounced, "you want to trade notes sometime?"

"Sure," Phineas replied, "That sounds good. Say, what time is it?"

Buford checked his watch. "Wedgie time." Baljeet shrieked (a sound not unlike one of his rock ballads) and ran.

"Eleven-fifteen," Stacy translated.

"Wow! We'd better hurry if we want to be in time for lunch."


End file.
